Some people want to be spanked until they cry. I’d love that myself, but I’ve come to the conclusion that’s not going to happen. I would love to be able to yell, though. I don’t. You see the problem is that if I yell ‘Stop!’ or ‘Enough!’ or even ‘Oww…’ Nick will stop. I don’t want him to stop, I just want to be able to yell.
I don’t like to lose control. What if I lose control and I can’t get it back? I even gave birth to both my children during that brief window when mothers were made to feel guilty if they took anything for pain, “Don’t you want your child to come into the world totally drug free?” I bought that crap and went through totally natural childbirth – twice! Never made a sound other than to ask for ice chips and a cold cloth for my face. I had to concentrate to manage everything.
So for me yelling equals a loss of control, something I long to be able to do, but I still can’t seem to. So I want Nick to spank me until I cry or yell for him to stop, and I want him not to stop – unless. Of course, it’s hurting and then certainly I want him to stop.
Megan Michaels said it well in a comment last week, “My fantasy is true discipline that makes me cry--but doesn't hurt really bad.” That’s what I want! I think it’s one great shortcoming of the male of the species that they can’t read minds. They need to work on that.